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The Prosecution: Beth

At times I'm recorded while I’m eating. I’ll see myself on her social media – it feels like a sudden shock.

My best friend of a decade, Marielle, labels herself the “content queen”. It’s fun for a short while, but it strains our friendship.

She is an extrovert, she feels the need to document everything all the time. During meals out, she says, “The camera eats first,” and snaps pictures with the flash on, which makes me cringe. I don’t like it when strangers see her performing for the camera – I experience secondhand embarrassment. Another annoyance is because the food gets cold.

She isn’t exactly an influencer yet, but she is trying to be. She makes vlogs about living in our city, her daily routine, and her work as a stylist. The material is quality, I’ll give her that, but I prefer not to be involved. On occasion she films me while I’m eating, or just accompanying her. I’ll see myself on her feed later, and it comes like a surprise: I might be no makeup on, an awkward face or photographed while eating. It’s uncomfortable.

Marielle also anticipates that I will to record her at inconvenient times. Often I’ll be talking to someone else, or we're simply hanging out in the street. I feel like our friendship has turned into me being her free crew. She has the means to employ someone if she wanted high-quality content. Upon mentioning my discomfort about the situation, she dismissed it. She’s taken me to several brand events, which was nice, but that doesn’t make up for all the time and effort I spend helping her make content.

I’m grateful that she has supported me with my design career, but I don’t want our friendship to become just a ledger of exchanges. I don't believe she's insincere or dishonest, but at times it seems that if the camera is out, we will begin acting in a way that presents a favorable image for her vlog.

Her directive is, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and record me smiling with someone. It feels forced. I need her to recognize that our 10-year friendship still has limits. I enjoy spending time with her, but I also want to experience it without being filmed, altered, or posted for an viewers. I’m not a prop for her online persona.

The Defence: The Content Creator's View

I want my friend to see that the content we make together can get us an opportunity.

I am passionate about shooting content. It’s not just a hobby; it's integral to who I am. Producing content and documenting experiences online enables me to show my personality and connect with people in new ways.

I don’t see myself as a full influencer yet, but it’s smart to make money from your interests. I look up to people on social platforms who pull off that style of casual, DIY content creation.

Creating content is my interpretation of engaging with life: observing the nuances, posting them with an viewership that values the craft behind it. I never intend to make Beth uneasy. Taking her to professional gatherings was my method of offering access, giving her a chance to experience behind-the-scenes moments that could help her career in design too. That isn't blackmail, it’s just being pragmatic.

I would take her to such functions even if she didn’t help me, but I desire her to see the benefits the content we create together can get us: an opening. I know not everyone enjoys being filmed, but sometimes spontaneity is what makes material authentic. Being recorded from time to time is part and parcel of being my friend. I would delete anything she requested, but she hasn't made such a request yet.

I don't demand anyone to be my private videographer, but companions support one another in minor capacities. I thought recording a clip here or there would be fun for her. Innovation flourishes in partnership, and having Beth around makes endeavors lively and pleasurable. I never force her to take part in anything, and I’d never deliberately embarrass her. But creating content jointly occasionally is part of how I record our time together.

I value Beth’s friendship deeply and don’t want content creation to drive a wedge between us. I am ready to compromise: like requesting permission before recording, and steering clear of angles that might make her self-conscious.

This is not about power, it’s about sharing my world while still respecting hers. Obviously making content is not a substitute for real connection: it’s just part of how I experience life and I want her to be included in a way that’s agreeable for both of us.

The Jury: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and her friend when they are out together?

Nothing is more uncomfortable than having a companion film you. I get that it's her job, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my workplace. Maybe she can find influencer friends to create content with. Given the uncertain future of technology, human connections are the only thing we have – cherish them!
A respondent, 25

If you’re doing something as a career, it's unfair to expect your friends for help repeatedly, even if they have helped previously. While she enjoys creating, that doesn't imply all those around her is willing material. She needs to honor her friend's privacy.
Another reader, 26

Marielle might love making content and displaying her life online, but it’s not for everybody. It’s nice she has helped her friend professionally, but she must to hear what Beth wants.
Emma, 27

It sounds like you value each other, so hold on to that and make sure it’s the priority in your relationship. Create some real experiences, where genuine feelings are preserved, not digital scrapbooks. Even public figures who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it appears.
Sarah, 53

She seems to be not fully engaged nor authentic when she’s with Beth – she's on the job. Both seem unsure as to what’s reasonable. The answer lies not in trying to alter one another, but in each establishing defined boundaries around what is comfortable to them and determining if there is an mutually agreeable middle ground.
Barbara, 71

Now You Be the Judge

Consider this question: has she been exploiting their bond?